Sunday, October 10, 2010

Proud To Be A Knudsenite.

In the beginning there was darkness, and verily did God look to Old Knudsen the basest and most vile of his Angels and he said, "Old Knudsen, I'm fucking stumped man, what goes well with darkness?" Old Knudsen scratched under his cap and thought, "good arse I thought you were dead" he said as he lifted his leg to let off a heavenly fart, "what about light?" God frowned and replied, "I've been putting on the pounds a bit and darkness is so slimming", getting frustrated Old Knudsen doth said, "ok ya big nelly how about a bit of light and a bit of dark, like Guinness but not so minging? you'll no doubt lose the belly soon, a fit lad like yerself. " God was greatly pleased and made it so and took the credit, little did he know it would cause things to grow then he'd have to invent humans to mow the grass and giraffes to eat the tree leaves, but Old Knudsen knew, hes a canny smart Ulster/Scots Angel.

In helping with creating the world and designing weemen's tits God gave Old Knudsen, Knudsen Nation which contains the most fair of all the people, well the most deluded at least.

Put yer name in the comments below to be considered for Knudsen Nation. If accepted (I'm not picky) you will be honoured with a post containing a few nice words and a link if you have somewhere to link too.
One day the spaceship from Bitorian shall cum and beam us up and we shall be immortal.
Some images of Knudsenites are an approximation for security purposes or how I imagine them to look.
The nation is only open to those I know and slighty trust or those who gain my trust, I can't go letting spies and such into it.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

George Clooney

You know its just the way he makes me feel.

George Clooney

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Ms Peel

A long time friend of mine she poses as a Blogging slacker and innocent on the verge of alcoholism but she is really one of the most deadly agents of the Australian Secret Intelligence Service (ASIS) her Tokyo job is now done and Japan's government is in turmoil she sheds her cover as Gaijin Gurl and assumes her usual role as Dorie the forgetful fish unsure where she is going in life while at the same time fighting the evil villains of the world as Ms Peel International Super Spy. She is as cute as a button but also mad, bad and dangerous to know, she'll only get close to those shes about to assassinate. What was that click on yer phone? it may be her.

She lives on the edge and has procrastination doon to a fine art, predictably unpredictable in a predictable way and will probably not do what you expect her to do which is how she has stayed alive for so long.

Welcome to the nation Dorie

Sunday, September 9, 2007

Reflecting Pool

Ms Pool as I call her from Relfecting pool is an intelligent humourous woman who has a knack of asking questions that are asked by everyone in the back of their heads and when they read them on her blog they say, "why didn't I think of that?" she has a talent for looking at the obvious in a different way to others a gift I envy. A ghey man trapped in a woman's body she works for the law firm of Bleedem and Screwyou as a morals justifier and at night she is the super crime fighter 'Hookerwoman' using hooks that cum out of her hands to apprehend criminals keeping the streets safe for junkies, pimps and hoors.

Welcome to the Nation miss Pool.

Friday, August 17, 2007

First Nations

A writer of talent she blends off the wall humour with real life tales, both equally as strange as each other. Claiming to be First Nations which is odd as we all know the Scottish are the first nation God made and all other people were molded from our feces (the English came from our diarrhea) she crafts brilliant, mental as fuck comments and poems to yers truly which clearly shows she wants me trouser snake but hey who doesn't?
Paul may be a nice name according to her blog title but I know a right cunt named Paul so what do you say about that? First Nations has proven herself in battle against the evil MJ and on her blog as a nutcase, welcome to The Knudsen Nation.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Inner Voices

A young man of American persuasion, a shadow who popped up and demanded that I elevate him to greatness. I am wary of new people as so many are out to kill me and force me to pay child support so I Investigated him.
I found him worthy of the nation because he completed the 101 challenge that so many weaker bloggers are too scared to do.
Young Zack of "What do the voices mean" is self proclaimed white trash who farts when he pleases and masturbates to ghey midget porn ..................... probably. Interesting yet angry he likes grunting female tennis players (who doesn't?) and exposing himself in public. I look forward to seeing yer art, the nation welcomes Inner Voices.

Babs Bitchin

Babz the brabbler, the founding member of the Dirty Bitch Society and spawn of the dark god Anternocitus otherwise known as Old Knudsen. Having lived a rough life on both sides of the law she has taken the lessons learned and moved on to create 57 blogs (2 more than me) full of fun, venom and advice, all the things a growing child needs.
Its true she is crazy as fuck and was once awarded the covetous Trainwreck award but underneath that hard armoured shell a soft under belly can be found though only the brave go looking for it.
She'll tell you what she thinks and has a respect for honesty and boldness, I'm sure shes ok with baldness too I'll have to ask.

Go looking for her at Babs Bitchin and The Dirty Bitch Society.